Wow! It's amazing how much can change in three years. Despite the smiling face these photos portray, this time three years ago I was a heartbroken train wreck and had no idea what self love was. I had subconsciously given away my power and put my worth in that someone else loved me, and so when that was no longer true I was like a ship lost out at sea, utterly destructive.
I look back on this time now with so much gratitude for the people and the process. I was loved and supported by so many of my dearest friends & family who knew I'd come out on the other side. I know I hurt some people (including a piñata, but that's another story!) and was often difficult to be around. I was angry and sad, but they didn't cast me out completely. There came a point early on in the healing when who I wanted to be became very clear. I could see it, but I still had to go through the healing process, live with the questions, navigate the dark waters, and then be able to stand firm on my own two feet, look myself in the eyes and say I. LOVE. YOU. I did this through yoga, dance, breath, meditation, connecting with nature, leaning on friends, lots of chocolate, through feeling it all and sometimes feeling nothing, but always choosing to rise.
So today no matter where you are in the process of life know there is hope and - should you chose - it's a sacred opportunity. As stated in this beautiful song, "You can't rush your healing. Darkness has its teachings. Love is never leaving. You can't rush your healing." (Trevor Hall) Take all that you can from every experience to learn, to grow, and to find gratitude.
There are a dozen different inspirational quotes I could put here, but this was the one that kept coming back to me at the time: "Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer." - Rainer Maria Rilke
I look back on this time now with so much gratitude for the people and the process. I was loved and supported by so many of my dearest friends & family who knew I'd come out on the other side. I know I hurt some people (including a piñata, but that's another story!) and was often difficult to be around. I was angry and sad, but they didn't cast me out completely. There came a point early on in the healing when who I wanted to be became very clear. I could see it, but I still had to go through the healing process, live with the questions, navigate the dark waters, and then be able to stand firm on my own two feet, look myself in the eyes and say I. LOVE. YOU. I did this through yoga, dance, breath, meditation, connecting with nature, leaning on friends, lots of chocolate, through feeling it all and sometimes feeling nothing, but always choosing to rise.
So today no matter where you are in the process of life know there is hope and - should you chose - it's a sacred opportunity. As stated in this beautiful song, "You can't rush your healing. Darkness has its teachings. Love is never leaving. You can't rush your healing." (Trevor Hall) Take all that you can from every experience to learn, to grow, and to find gratitude.
There are a dozen different inspirational quotes I could put here, but this was the one that kept coming back to me at the time: "Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer." - Rainer Maria Rilke
